Oh My Eye

There's a comic, who I really like, called Kevin Meaney, and he does a bit about ramming himself in the eye with a mic while on stage and while doing it, he howls, "Oh my eye!" I have been screaming that for days now. For the last several days, it's felt like I've had shards of glass in my eyes, particularly my left. Since I wear rigid gas permeable contacts, I kind of do have shards of glass in my eyes, but they have like to have killed me in the last couple of days in particular. I've been walking around like a pirate with one eye covered and the other weeping profusely. It's not been good.

This morning at around 11AM I threw in towel, as well as my male pride, and called the eye doctor, and said that I was on my way in. Fortunately, they could see me at 1230PM. The doctor did a lot of hemming and hawing and then started to use subjunctive language (I hate when they do that and I hate it worse when an airline pilot does it at 37,000 feet), like "It seems" or "It appears" or "I'd like to say..." Say what? That I'm going blind. Make with it! Here's the verdict - apparently, I managed to get something "embedded" (the doctor's word - not mine) in my right eye. However, it's now gone. But while it was embedded it left an indelible mark, much like a reporter embedded with US forces in Iraq. I have a gash in my eye and I have been exacerbating the issue every time I put a contact in my right eye. So it's swollen and fighting back. Apparently, pain isn't just annoying, it's sending a message. Since I don't speak pain, I didn't quite understand that. So, the contacts are now on temporary hiatus and it's back to my glasses. I am also dropping antibiotics into my right eye every hour and then I have steroids to drop in my eye if the pain gets heinous.

Courtney doesn't want me to use the steroid drops. She thinks my right eye is going to get bigger than my left. That got me wondering...could I get eye rage? That would be kind of cool. Have your eye go all "Hulk" when things get interesting.

Anyway, day two of Single Dad and no one's complaining or wishing for the sweet relief of death yet. Score one for me! Have talked to Shari a couple of times and all appears to be going well in Phoenix. I am very glad about that! That being said, I'll be thrilled when she's home!