Dating Rituals of the American Teen

As the father of two girls and now a son who is a teenager, I've always been a bit unnerved by seeing them get into the dating scene. With Our Lady of BYU 1,400 miles away in school, she's far enough away where I can claim plausible deniability, which is fine with me. Besides, she never tells me a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g (I am telling you she may know where Osama is and no one would ever know from her), so that makes my deniability all the more plausible.

With CAL, it's a different story. She's here and there's nowhere for me to hide and deny. This past week I've had some unique insight into the fascinating world of teen dating. While we are still in the thick of a never-ending winter here in the Midwest, CAL's high school is getting ready for the big shindig that is the Spring Dance. This is one of the dances where it is tradition for the girls to ask the boys. So CAL and several of her girl friends decided to ask a bunch of boys and have planned a fun night. The invitation process, as it turns out, is elaborate. Each girl did her own thing. To ask her "date," CAL went with a fish theme. She bought three gold fish, put them in a fishbowl, and took them over to his house, with a note referencing all the fish in the sea that ended with asking him to the dance.

Said young man responded today. Here's his response:
A goldfish, as seen from the 2nd floor of our house. Really. It is. I promise.

So he said yes and now we've moved onto the DRAMA of finding a dress. I say we, but the only role I will have in this is paying for it, which is fine by me. CAL is being a real trooper as she tries to find a dress that doesn't look like it was bought at Whores 'R Us. Which, quite frankly, is virtually impossible. But I'm confident she and the stunningly patient SML will find the right one. Better her than me, that's all I'm saying.