As usual, we have this all wrong. All wrong. The Mayans never predicted the end of the world. Read here for the background - fair warning, it's from NPR and I don't want to be the reason for a stroke from an unsuspecting reader who thinks NPR is a tool of Satan (it's not).
With all the hype, I've had the lyrics to R.E.M's "It's the End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)" banging around my head. What better to have rattling around in your head than an apocalyptic theme song? It's made better by the fact that it's sung by Michael Stipe, an American version of Morrissey. Nothing says 'end of the world' like ironic, plaintive, depressive activists. If it is the end of the world as we know it, like Mr. Stipe, I do feel fine.
While the Mayan doomsday scenario seems to have been debunked, there is some rock-solid proof that the end is nigh: the McRib is back. What better, and by better I mean gut-wrenchingly appalling, food to usher us into the apocalypse! When all is said and done with this world, I am convinced three things will remain:
- The Kardashians, and
- The McRib