I (Don't) Got My Tight Pants On

All kinds of wrong

As a follow up to my last post, wherein I pondered the possibilities of sporting a caftan to ease the wear and tear on my incisions, I'm here to report on today's achievement. I wore pants for the first time in ten days. By pants, lest you think the last ten days has been a parade of open-backed, rump-baring hospital gowns, which it has not been, I mean something that isn't either a pajama bottom or sweats. I wore honest-to-goodness pants today.

I am delighted to report that I had them on for nearly seven hours before they were switched back to the sweats I've come to know and love the last ten days. It was a good test run for Sunday because it's back to Church and heaven knows, that is not a "pants optional" affair. Ever. And then Monday, it's back to work and again, not a place where sweats rule. So today's test run was a good one.

Also, I've never been a fan of tight pants. Except for an ill-advised period of my life wherein I incessantly wore favored a pair of acid-washed Marithe et Francois Girbaud jeans (guess the year!), I have steadfastly eschewed tight pants. There are all sorts of reasons for that, not the least of which is that I've tried to not have homes equipped with fun house mirrors, thus giving me an altered view of reality. Far too many people seem to have homes equipped with fun house mirrors. Seriously.

The horror of tight pants was brilliantly lampooned by Jimmy Fallon and Will Ferrell during a skit on "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon." It's a riot and it showcases the awesomeness that is Fallon. He did his last show this week as he prepares to take over "The Tonight Show." Jay Leno's horrific reign of terror is now over, assuming of course he does not hatch another blitzkrieg on Jimmy like he did Conan. I don't see that happening. So, in honor of the great Mr. Fallon and the fact that I could put pants back on today, I give you "I Got My Tight Pants On":