Bacon...don't let swine flu get you down

Can I just tell you how DONE I am with swine flu? While I am pleased to report that no one I know is afflicted (and frankly given all the time I've spent in some of the swine "hot" zones, I'm probably ripe for it), I am up to my ears in swine flu at work. It started last Friday afternoon with some e-mail exchanges with some peers and then it quite literally erupted Sunday afternoon as soon as I got home from Church. Stupid 'berry full of emails and voicemails. I didn't even get a chance to change out of my church-going finery. It was straight into the home office, dinner in hand, to work the issues. It was obvious too that my Monday work at home day was done too.

So in I went this morning. Again, all day on calls, meetings with colleagues across the globe, working the issues and our responses and providing employee assistance. It's been a lovely day. And now that the WHO has decided to essentially call it a pandemic, now tomorrow will be super-not-fun.

Now I am very sorry about those people that have gotten sick and died from the influenza. That's no good. I am, however, also concerned about the impact that this is having on the most wonderful of all things pork, bacon. I love bacon. Is there nothing it can't cure?

I think we can for the most part agree that bacon is awesome. And now, it is being sullied something awful by swine flu. There is no way you can get swine flu from eating bacon. You simply can't. I would argue that the more time you spend eating bacon, the less time you are out in the sneezy, contagious public - hence lessening chances of getting some ailment. Of course, you're probably ripe for some other ailment but that's another story. In scouring the web for all things bacon, I've discovered blogs dedicated to its glory and goodness; bacon bras (I'm not kidding about that - I wish I was); bacon photo galleries; just plain goodness. This gem took the top spot:
I'd floss 40 times a day!

Who needs mint-flavored floss when there's this? Good grief - this eliminates any excuse for not flossing! See...it's like I said, is there nothing bacon can't cure? Well, this much I know, bacon's been through it before, and it will survive this brush with infamy as well.

I feel a Mileage Run coming on

I'd love to say that what I'm feeling is the desire to get in some serious miles running. The truth is that I'd love to run again but I'm still under the running ban until the first week of May, which is killing me, as the weather has finally turned great here in Chicagoland. I saw one of my buddies running today around noon and I was jealous to the point of coveting the ability to run. Rather than wallow in covetousness, I figured I should focus on something else. Like a mileage run.

Anyway, the mileage run I refer to is one that will only require running through airports. In the airline industry's collective stupidity to stimulate traffic, several carriers have offered double- and triple-Elite mileage qualifying schemes that are good through the middle of June. While there's plenty of ways to define a mileage run, the way I see it is getting as many segments with the most miles for the least amount of money possible in a fairly short amount of time. Wikipedia does a more eloquent job of defining a mileage run if you are so inclined. I need to shore up my status on United for 2010 and with all the travel cutbacks at work, I don't see it happening through business travel. So I need to find a few places to get to on the cheap, adding up as many segments as I can. I need to add a few more lines to this map:
Or this one:

So that's my quest. Suggestions are welcome. It doesn't need to be an international destination per se. If you've had any luck with a mileage run, let me know.

Those cheeky, talented Brits

While I was in China last week, Our Lady of BYU sent me a link to a YouTube clip of some woman called Susan Boyle. Since I was on my Blackberry, I couldn't play the clip (well I could but I didn't want to pay the international roaming charges). All Our Lady said was you'll be surprised. By all that's holy, she's right. Have you seen the clip? Well, stupid YouTube (Fascists/Hypocrites! Seriously, who do they think they are?) have disabled all ability to embed ANY of the clips related to this woman, so click on the link above to give it a go. I'd just like to point out that I wish they'd be as vigilant in monitoring the really hideous stuff that seems to get through their stupid site as they are things like this. So much for their owner, Google's mantra, do no evil.

All right, first things first, to look at, she's a trainwreck. And we all judged accordingly, but what a voice! She blew out the performing hall and I know that my jaw hit the ground the minute she started to sing. I honestly thought she was lipsynching at first. It's an amazing performance. Now, it could be a flash in the pan. Who knows?

It's not the first time this show, "Britain's Got Talent" has found a trainwreck and turned it into something amazing. A couple of years ago, the same show had a bloke on called Paul Potts. When he walked onto the stage, it was the same reaction. You took one look at him and thought, "Oh my. No good can come from this." Well, look what happened:

So this guy has since sold over two million albums and is soon to release another one. The clip is classic - watching Simon Cowell midway through, you can see his head spinning, thinking "How am I going to turn this mess into a cash cow?"

Anyway, both talented people. Incredible voices. Nice reminder about judging a book by its cover. English food=bad. English village singers=good, really good.

It only gets angrier

Last night's post came from an airport hotel in lovely, and by lovely I mean complete and total hole, Newark, New Jersey. I thought that was exacerbating my condition and that things would turn for the better upon my return to Chicagoland this morning. While it was all kinds of good to have the stunningly patient SML pick me up this morning at ORD, getting home did not cure me.

I'm not pleasant when I'm sick so I had warned the family and they were prepared. It's been a long day. You know it's bad when your wife tells you the following: "Um...you've got a funk going on." And by funk she's not referring to my dancing skills or a heightened state of depression. This in spite of the fact that I had showered and I maintain a pretty high state of cleanliness. It's the demon inside of me working its way out. So this is how I feel right now:

And here's my new BFF:

I'll say this...whatever is tearing through me (and tearing through me faster than the French caved to the Nazis), it's not going to make me give up the adventure of trying new foods all over the world. This is merely a minor setback. It's also a bit of a diet aid. Since I can't start running again for two more weeks, when my one month running ban is lifted, this is merely eliminating a few pounds that normally would have come off in a couple of runs. See, there's good to be found in everything.