20 June 2010

A melancholy Father's Day

It's a beautiful summer Sunday afternoon, one of those that makes living in the Midwest awesome. Another awesome part of the day - Brazil won its match against the Ivory Coast in World Cup play. Some fine fake injury drama on the pitch too during the match made it fun to watch.

The day dawned early as I had church meetings starting at 6AM. I was out of the house before the stunningly patient and mighty fine SML and the Boy were awake. We connected later at church. Our service focused on the love of our Father in Heaven and I spent a great deal of the meeting thinking about His love and the tender mercies He has shown me and my family. I could not help but think of my late father and the love always showed me. This is the first Father's Day since his passing last September. This realization is where the day's melancholy kicked in. I miss him and will miss not talking to him today, to wish him a happy Father's Day and to once again thank him for all he did for me. I'm most grateful that we had those conversations while he was living and that I don't feel like things were left unsaid. They weren't. I'm glad we had the relationship that we did and I'm most grateful to know that our relationship has not ended. It's just "on hold" until we are joined together again. And we will be, of that I am certain.

So that sense of melancholy is still hanging around, to be honest. The girls are together in Utah and I'm missing the Highnesses. But the melancholy is offset by the other events of the day. When I got home from my post-church meetings, I was told to go take a nap. So up to bed I went and shortly thereafter, I got my belated breakfast in bed. Vanilla scones. Pretty darn excellent. And then it was time to read the Sunday New York Times with one eye while watching World Cup out the other. And now I'm getting psych'd for dinner - spicy pasta and shrimp with red velvet cupcakes for dessert. I've said it before and I'll say it again, there is nothing that the cupcake can't do. They are awesome.

So, while I'm a bit melancholy, I'm also know I've been blessed by tremendous examples of fatherhood in my late father and late father-in-law and in the stunningly patient and mighty fine SML's stepfather, Paul. I'm grateful for those examples and they all make me want to be a better father to my children every day. I am so proud of our Lady of BYU, CAL, and the Boy. It's an honor to be their dad. I am grateful for that privilege.

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